Here, lookin’ at you kid, is Dallas.
126. you spilled your hot come on my hot girlfriend: horizontal with the king of cuckolding [1 of 2]
Hello my horizontal lovers, my intimacy investigators, my horizontalists! horizontal is the podcast about intimacy of all kinds, recorded while lying down (and usually, while wearing robes). With few exceptions, our conversations are languorous, meandering, and long-form, as though post-coital, or stargazing, or staring out onto the open road in the wee hours of a very long road trip.
Dallas: Your role is to not love her, fall in love with her, steal her away, or any of that bullshit. Your role is to please. That’s it! You’re there, for one thing. Now, that’s singular. There’s a spectrum, of course. Some people want other things. I’ve been asked, Oh, take her out on dates, you know what I mean, Go on vacation with her. Come to Vegas. Take her to Vegas. Fly over here with her. Actually be the, basically the side boyfriend, that they don’t have time to be. You know what I mean, I’ve been in those situations. So— but in its singular form, you’re there to provide a good time, in the bedroom, behind closed doors, in an intimate sensual and sexual fashion.
Lila: So what turns you on about that?
Dallas: It’s so raw. It’s just so raw. That, in more cases than not […] the guys that are asking me to sleep with their wife or girlfriend, are not pushovers. These guys are CEO’s. They own businesses of a hundred people, employees. They don’t have any money problems. They go on vacation, more than they fuckin’ live their life. They’re fuckin’, they’re top of their pyramid. These guys have no problem getting a woman, or anything like that. To be asked, by another alpha male, to do something that he can no longer do? It’s pretty amazing.
Lila: Is that the case, he can no longer do it? Most of these scenarios?
Dallas: […] Oh man, there’s such a spectrum. It could be: I’m tired of fucking my wife. It could be: My wife is tired of fucking me. It could be that: You know what, I only get off on watching porn, not my wife anymore. But I’ve met couples where they’re in their first year of marriage, so no one’s tired of fucking anyone, at that point! Then it’s just something different. No, I get turned on by watching. By voyeurism. Not only that! I get turned on by watching somebody please somebody that I love. I get turned on by watching somebody turn on somebody that I love, cumming all over their face, so that, when you leave, I can kiss her all night. These are the different spectrums. I mean there’s so many different variations, but it comes down to one variation where, it is in its simplest form: another man, is in one way or the other, getting turned on, by letting another man sleep with the wife. Now, here’s a funny— here’s a interesting, not a funny one: I’ve known guys, that want this from me … just for the outcome of causing conflict […] and issues and drama and conflict and anger, with their wife or girlfriend. Just for that.
Lila: Yeah! Because! Jealousy is an age-old aphrodisiac.
Hello my horizontal lovers, my intimacy investigators, my horizontalists!
horizontal is the podcast about intimacy of all kinds, recorded while lying down (and usually, while wearing robes).
With few exceptions, our conversations are languorous, meandering, and long-form, as though post-coital, or stargazing, or staring out onto the open road in the wee hours of a very long road trip. It’s a private conversation made public. It’s consensual eavesdropping.
Typically on horizontal, each conversation is between 3 and 5 hours long, and divided into two to four parts. The former half is available to all horizontalists, and the latter, is available exclusively to patrons of the horizontal arts.
This is Season 4, my Season of Experiments. During this season, I’m investigating form and format, length and structure, context and content. Playing aurally. Trying things I haven’t tried yet.
Thus far, Season 4 has seen a mash-up with Devin Person’s “this podcast is a ritual” show, episodes with more-or-less intrusive narration (you decide), and a session with a matchmaker in which I get interviewed, as the client.
you spilled your hot come on my hot girlfriend, this episode, is my very first recording spotlighting a single sexy topic!
Meet Dallas.
In episodes 126 & 127, I lie down with Dallas King: L.A. native, global hedonist, director, filmmaker, hot professor, model, and profoundly experienced bull.
He is writing the book on cuckolding. Literally. That’s what he’s in Bali to do.
It’s called GASM.
For images featuring such highlights as Dallas’s rippling abs, brooding fashion sense, and graphic tattoos, witness his Instagram @dallasking1
In this first half of our recording, we talk about:
- craigslist personals
- what cuckolding means
- “the lifestyle” versus sex-positive culture
- working as a massage therapist in L.A. & becoming a bull
- his first time pleasing another man’s wife & being watched while doing it
- grappling with professional, mental, and religious inhibitions
- homophobia & sexual performance
- how being a bull can affect your romantic relationships
- humiliation & emasculation
- agreeing on where to come
- navigating couple dynamics
- dealing with your own expectations
- cuckqueens, and …
- my desire to be a female bull.
For access to the spicy second half of this conversation, as well as 50 other exclusive episodes, navigate yourself directly to:
Make sure you click that link or type that in exactly, because, as a creator who is considered “adult,” my profile isn’t searchable on Patreon. (!)
Other than that, Patreon is great. It’s like the love child of crowdfunding and a subscription service. You can become a patron for $7/month on up, and the rewards get more and more sumptuous. For instance, at the $100 level, you get a 30-minute one-on-one Intimacy Guidance session with me every month…
Upcoming in Season 4, I have a recording from my guest spot on Dominick Q & Bryan Stacey’s “The Great Man Within” podcast, a couple of episodes with the journalist Sue Jaye Johnson, in which she interviewed me for her project “The Pleasure Report,” a 5-part mini-series with Jet-Setting Jasmine, who you must know — a badass Black therapist & porn star, and her incredible Dom husband, and a daughter that gives me hope for the future of humanity, as well as shows with segments, a la NPR, among other explorations.
Until next time: May you have someone to love, something to do, and something to look forward to.
I’m looking forward to scripting and rehearsing my first TED-style talk, and the event I curated around it to celebrate the 4-year podcast-aversary on May 21st, 2021! It’s gonna be called “Hot Love Talks.”
Thank you for listening. Thank you for getting horizontal.
Now, come lie down with us, in Seminyak, Bali, Indonesia.
horizontal with Dallas King in Seminyak, Bali, Indonesia
Links to Things:
Dallas’s IG with ripplings abs, etc.
On FOSTA-SESTA: “Sex Workers Tell Us What Support They Actually Need From Politicians”
Show Notes:
(if you quote from this resource, please link back to this post or the horizontal Patreon!)
[4:46] Dallas on wanting to be a senator when he grew up. Lila on wishing that a politician’s sex life didn’t affect public opinion on the way they govern.
Dallas: I wanted to be a senator when I was younger—
Lila: Seriously?
Dallas: — yeap. You know, a politician. A senator of California. And I was like, “Na, the sex tape already came out. It’s too late for that.”
Lila: I would love it if we got to the place where that didn’t fuckin’ matter, right? (Dallas hmm’s) Where it didn’t have to come out as a scandal later because […] you would just know —
Dallas: Yeah.
Lila: — and it’s not a big deal! Somebody’s sex life does not determine how they can—
Dallas: Right.
Lila: — do this job! Come on!
Dallas: Someone later would be like, “Was that— wasn’t that you on Craigslist?” And I’d be like, “Fuck yeah it was!”
Lila: Yes indeed it was!
Dallas: Weren’t you on there too? (laughs)
Lila: It was a great time. I’m sure we met…
[5:42] Dixie de la Tour & Craigslist personals, as community
Lila: Dixie de la Tour. She has the longest-running sex storytelling series in the U.S. […] You just reminded me of her, because she told a story about Craigslist, Personals back in the day.
Dallas: Oh gosh! Oh yeah. That’s still! Infamous, what are you talkin’ about?
Lila: Yeah but it’s not— it’s shut down now, because of FOSTA-SESTA.
Dallas: I know. But we, we we upgraded. Or we— it’s like we got orphaned little children and we all got put out on different apps—
Lila: Yeah!
Dallas: And we’re lucky if we find each other again, you know.
Lila: Really!
Dallas: I mean I can only from about, Los Angeles, but there was such a community. To the point where it was like, Oh yeah, I remember I saw your posting! You know what I mean, Oh we finally meet! You know? There were some guys I had talked to for years, looking to like, combine forces for like swinging parties and then, two/three years later we finally meet up and we’re like, “Where did we meet?” “Oh fuck! Craigslist ad, man!”
Lila: Wooooow.
Dallas: And it was already been taken down. But we still stayed in contact, you know.
[6:40] Lila & Dallas reminisce about Craigslist’s Missed Connections
Lila: I remember loving Missed Connections. I posted, probably twice, over the course of maybe 6 years in Missed Connections, and I remember just reading them just for joy!
Dallas: Yeah… Somebody posted on Missed Connections to find me, and, somebody said, “Hey, I think someone… described you on Missed Connection—” (laughs)
Lila: Woooow! I was hoping that would happen.
Dallas: It does! It has happened. Yeah, for sures.
Lila: Yeah, wow. Even in such a big city as L.A.
Dallas: Yeah… yeah, big little city— technology though really,
Lila: Makes a big city smaller.
[7:24] Dallas on cuckolding vs. cock holding
[8:00] Terminology: The Lifestyle vs. sex-positivity
Dallas: It just goes to show it’s not a very common sector within The Lifestyle. And when we say “Lifestyle,” when I hear that, I mean: it’s a broad spectrum.
Lila: Do you mean sex-positivity when you say Lifestyle?
Dallas: You know what’s funny is that, not until I traveled internationally do I even hear that word as much, like— and again, you know, I’m always coming from a voice of Los Angeles for most of my life, and, although I’ve traveled 60 countries, I, I wanna feel like I could, have kinda an international vibe but it always blows my mind about, depending upon where you’re at, not where you’re from, the terminology of things being used more and less, is very very interesting to me. And so, my time here coming to Bali, I had to try to just keep an open mind and an open ear about things that are commonly used and things that are not, and things that I’m used to may not be here. No judgements at all, I just think it’s a different vibe and a different feel.
Lila: I very rarely hear anybody say The Lifestyle. Actually, the only people I’ve heard say that are stringers— str—
Dallas: Swing— swingers?
Lila: (laughing) Stringers!
Dallas: I wanna meet a stringer, yeah!
Lila: Whoa, what are stringers like?
Dallas: String— string me on, you know? Lead me on! (laughs)
Lila: Hey! I think you’ve met a few of those though.
Dallas: (reluctantly) Yyeah.
Lila: Alright, no, swingers: are swingers specifically. […] And that’s what I associated it with so I thought The Lifestyle equals swinging.
Dallas: Swinging. It’s kinda like: So in America we say EDM music, Electronic Dance Music, which encompasses all 20+ genres. Anything electronic, synth-made, it kinda falls underneath EDM, right?
Lila: Yeah.
Dallas: I come to Bali, everyone’s just like, “Oh, techno.” And I’m like, “Techno?!” Like, techno’s actually a specific genre in America—
Lila: Oh, of EDM.
Dallas: Yeah, of EDM, like, there’s techno artists. And I didn’t understand that, for like a month. […] I guess for me it helps me understand that The Lifestyle, there’s a huge spectrum. And we can say from conservative, to extremely radical, if we’re looking at a spectrum, right? And in that spectrum of, quote unquote, a lifestyle or kink lifestyle, I think there’s many different playgrounds for people and obviously, there’s so many crossovers, so many hybrid, so many grey area, I mean, there’s not gonna ever be like, Oh, this is the religiously this and if you don’t do this then you’re not that—
Lila: Of course.
Dallas: I mean I don’t— Yeah, please. So, it’s just a easier way to define things, I believe. And mind you, when I’m meeting people, this is the first time they’ve even dipped their toe into the puddle of any Lifestyle. So I really have to keep an open mind and try to welcome them in. I really try to use friendly terms to not scare the fuck out of people, coming into it, because they’re kinky, they’re openminded, they know they want more sexually, or sensually, or mentally. But they don’t know the ins or outs of going about it.
Lila: So do you feel like The Lifestyle as terminology is less scary to people than sex-positive culture?
Dallas: You know, here’s something interesting: I’ve been using the word “sex-positive” more, and, I’ve said it to people that have no idea what that word means […] annnd, they’ve taken it the wrong way. So you almost have to educate people about what sex positive actually means.
Lila: (overlapping) You do. When you say it, you have to define it usually.
Dallas: Right. I can, tell the stories of someone’s like, “Sex-positive— No, I don’t have HIV!” […] They’re like, “Positive, sex-positive, no I don’t have a lot of sex.” No no nonono, that’s not it either. […]
Lila: Absolutely. And I think of that as part of my job, so I do it a lot. So I use the terminology, and then, you know, wait. (giggle) So that, so that I get the question, so I can answer the question. But I’m, I’m getting you as, it is an umbrella term— you’re using The Lifestyle as an umbrella term, just as I use “intimacy” as the umbrella term and underneath that, I place sex, love, and relationships of all kinds. All kinds of connection I place under the umbrella of intimacy. So when people say I make a sex podcast, I say, “Well that is partially true. Yes and.” That and all other kinds of intimacy. And that is also something that’s really important to me, is to sort of expand people’s notion of what intimacy is, and also see if I can… soften the primacy of the romantic and the sexual relationships— people are putting all their eggs in that basket and then, going hungry, basically.
Dallas: I understand.
Lila: When they don’t, don’t have that.
[12:54] Dallas’s early experience as a virgin bull
Dallas: So circling back to cuckolding, it’s been a challenge, and a very learning experience, going back now, let’s say, 9 years, in the lifestyle of cuckolding. And, starting from basically a virgin, a virgin bull (chuckles) as we would say.
Lila: Wow.
Dallas: Starting from a virgin bull of just being offered: Hey, would you like to sleep with my wife? You know, and how alien that felt. Which, for me is everything. Because, when I meet people who are just getting into cuckolding, and, quote unquote, that specific lifestyle, I go back to my early years, of how I misperceived, and didn’t know, and just, my mind wasn’t that exposed and that experienced and that open at the time. And, my mind is connected to my emotions— I remember the first time I was put in that situation, I couldn’t perform because, my mind and— I didn’t know how to separate my mind and my emotions and therefore it connected to, my other body parts and they didn’t work! You know! And it took a while to retrain, rewire, and re, re-synthesize things for it to work in this type of scenario.
[14:10] Dallas tells the story of the first time he was propositioned to be a bull… as a massage therapist
[22:47] Dallas shares his virgin bull story
[26:36] The inhibitions that can arise for the bull, of the spiritual, moral, ethical, professional, & mental varieties
Lila: What are the things that came up? What are the inhibitions that came up? What’s in your brain, that’s keeping you from connecting your body to your arousal?
Dallas: Yeah I mean, that, in itself, is the biggest journey. And I mean this is something, in the book I’m writing, that, I’m very much focusing on, because, so many times people think like, cuckolding … in its, in its rawness term, which is: when another man, enjoys to see his wife or girlfriend, getting pleased by another man. I mean that’s in its general term, right? But see, immediately you’re just thinking the sex, the fucking, the whatever, right? But no. It’s, it’s so much more than that. And, for the bull? There’s the emotional hangups, because you’ve had past lovers and what does this— how does this apply? What if you’re wi— in a relationship, too? I’ve had that issue. And not even be able to get excited or perform with somebody that I’m in love with, and because I’m so used to this type of extracurricular lifestyle. The mental, of course, the blockages there, of somebody else being in the room, somebody else being involved, and there’s many ways to not be involved, there’s many ways to be involved. I had, in the very beginning, a lot of issues morally, because of my spiritual and religious foundation of Catholicism, of adultery, and Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife. […] Thou shall not sleep with another man’s wife!
Lila: Right!
Dallas: So I had that issue to even go through, you know what I mean? So that’s a huge one to understand. And then, all of those, I don’t care how King Ding-a-Ling you are— it’s gonna have an affect on your performance.
[29:04] The homophobic hang-ups that can reveal themselves when being witnessed in a sexual situation by a man
Dallas: Then you have the idea that, there’s another person in the bedroom […] watching, that’s a male, and you’re not, you’re not gay, and you don’t, and you don’t—
Lila: What does it mean?
Dallas: Right, so there’s these homophobic issues that you have as a heterosexual. Then there’s the issues of: you have to perform above and beyond, because now you have a woman, and depending on what level of experience, and most of them are pretty experienced— well their expecting a fuckin’, a bull! I don’t like to dilute that word! I mean you’re, you better step up to the plate. You’re a lion, so you better perform like one! Because that’s why you’re being invited into the room.
Lila: That’s why you’re there. So there’s this performance stress, basically this is like game time, it’s go time—
Dallas: Sure, sure. Sure!
Lila: And you gotta show up and you’d better have an erection, etcetera.
Dallas: And let me tell you, I’ve been in many rooms with many other guys that are considered bulls that did not rise to the occasion. And I think a lot of it has to do with the mental blockage and mental preparedness.
[30:03] What did the cuckold do when Dallas, as requested, brought another bull into the mix, and that bull failed to rise to the occasion?
[33:08]
Dallas: We’re doing DP stuff here! And it’s working! It’s flowing! And it’s very difficult to do, and she’s with it, and it’s happening. It goes an hour! We all finish in some glorious bukkake-style stuff. And uh, afterwards— now mind you, I’ve known this guy for about five months. This is at least five, six, or seven encounters. But this is like: This is the end. […] Never hear from them, never see them ever again. And, then he reveals: He’s like, “Hey.” And I (chuckles) I don’t know how to take this, but I’m just gonna say it: He’s like, “Hey. I used to be a porn star.” He’s like, “You did really good.” […] Translation: just being able to stay hard and stay excited in the moment, of so much conflict happening, is everything in this, this Lifestyle. It is so challenging, I must say, to be excited, from a male’s point of view. Because we’re so external. And if our thing isn’t hard then we’re just useless as a bull. As a bull in in, in the wild, you are looked at to perform, to breed the herd, to continue the race. And that’s your role. That is your sole role. You are here to breed the strongest, of our race to continue, until your no longer, can perform, and then you’re out, and the next bigger, baddest bull is gonna take over. I watch this shit on National Geographic, and I’m like, Damn! Am I the young bull or the old bull comin’ in, you know what I mean? And I’m over here butting heads with bulls.
[34:59] The mental hangup of being watched by a man
[36:57] Lila on how heteronormativity hurts all of us
[37:53] How the cuckolding lifestyle can affect a conventional relationship
Dallas: I think when it’s like a one-off or a couple times, you know what I mean, it’s one thing, but when you start getting into some consistency, with this cuckold lifestyle where you’re the bull, and you’re constantly being asked to please another, another man’s girl, when you walk into a conventional relationship with someone, of a lover, on a level like that, it becomes not the norm. The norm is like, this is not the dynamic. So what I found is that— […] I, actually get turned on knowing that I am being sought after — talk about no strings attached! You know your rule— your role. Your role is to not love her, fall in love with her, steal her away, or any of that bullshit. Your role is to please. That’s it! You’re there, for one thing. Now, that’s singular. There’s a spectrum, of course. Some people want other things. I’ve been asked, Oh, take her out on dates, you know what I mean, Go on vacation with her. Come to Vegas. Take her to Vegas. Fly over here with her. Actually be the, basically the side boyfriend, that they don’t have time to be. You know what I mean, I’ve been in those situations. So— but in its singular form, you’re there to provide a good time, in the bedroom, behind closed doors, in an intimate sensual and sexual fashion.
Lila: So what turns you on about that?
Dallas: It’s so raw. It’s just so raw. That, in more cases than not […] the guys that are asking me to sleep with their wife or girlfriend, are not pushovers. These guys are CEO’s. They own businesses of a hundred people, employees. They don’t have any money problems. They go on vacation, more than they fuckin’ live their life. They’re fuckin’, they’re top of their pyramid. These guys have no problem getting a woman, or anything like that. To be asked, by another alpha male, to do something that he can no longer do? It’s pretty amazing.
Lila: Is that the case, he can no longer do it? Most of these scenarios?
Dallas: […] Oh man, there’s such a spectrum. It could be: I’m tired of fucking my wife. It could be: My wife is tired of fucking me. It could be that: You know what, I only get off on watching porn, not my wife anymore. But I’ve met couples where they’re in their first year of marriage, so no one’s tired of fucking anyone, at that point! Then it’s just something different. No, I get turned on by watching. By voyeurism. Not only that! I get turned on by watching somebody please somebody that I love. I get turned on by watching somebody turn on somebody that I love, cumming all over their face, so that, when you leave, I can kiss her all night. These are the different spectrums. I mean there’s so many different variations, but it comes down to one variation where, it is in its simplest form: another man, is in one way or the other, getting turned on, by letting another man sleep with the wife. Now, here’s a funny— here’s a interesting, not a funny one: I’ve known guys, that want this from me … just for the outcome of causing conflict […] and issues and drama and conflict and anger, with their wife or girlfriend. Just for that.
Lila: Yeah! Because! Jealousy is an age-old aphrodisiac.
[42:05] What happens when couples in long-distance relationships enlist Dallas?
[43:13] What does humiliation do for the cuckold?
Dallas: It’s such a interesting paradigm, that a man […] it’s amazing that a relationship between a husband and wife can exist, where the man has literally been — what’s that great word that you call? Emasculated? […] He’s literally, you know metaphorically, had his balls cut off, in front of the wife. And what amazes me — and this is why this dynamic is so fucking interesting to me — is that they can go on after this experience, to continue their happily marriage, and, it even gets stronger. Blows my mind.
Lila: Do you think that emasculation, can only happen, because there’s still a notion of women as property, and wives as property? Because otherwise, somebody having sex with your partner, means nothing about you! Unless you have a— an ownership, a sense of ownership over her.
Dallas: Well you, you bring up a great point. ‘Cause now we’re talking about humiliation. So in some cases, I am asked to verbally humiliate the cuck. In some cases, I’m asked to verbally and physically humiliate the cuck.
Lila: Like coming on him?
Dallas: And in some cases, I’m asked to verbally and physically humiliate both parties. You know what I mean.
Lila: OHHhh.
Dallas: So, there’s many different dynamics here.
[44:49] The questions Dallas asks when he goes in to a cuckold situation
Dallas: But so when I go into any cuckold situation, communication is key. So I’ve gotten used to asking the most standard of questions, like, “What are you expecting? In an ideal world, what are you wanting?” Okay? “What are your boundaries? What is gonna turn you on the most? Verbally, physically. And I’m very specific of asking: “Are you expecting to be humiliated?” Half the time it’s “Yeah, can you do that?” You know, they’re like, “Oh my God, somebody’s not— freaked out by doing that!” And then the other cases are like, “No! No humiliation bro!” You know what I mean? “None of that shit!” […] And there’s even variations. There’s guys that are called stags. And that’s not necessarily a cuckold relationship when you’re a stag, but sometimes it is. A stag is a guy who’s— he’s an alpha. A stag is an alpha. But he’s just okay with allowing another man to sleep with his wife. But he also will get involved sexually. Into the threesome. […] But it’s less of a threesome, and still more of a, I want you to fuck her brains out, and I will join in maybe. And if I do, there’s no humiliation, it’s both of us tag-teaming, and it’s all good.
Lila: Less of a voyeur, and not really a cuck, because cuck implies this humiliation piece.
Dallas: Right. I rarely have ever seen a stag sit on a chair, drinking his whisky, jacking off while I fuck his wife.
[46:20] Why would a stag go in the other room?
[47:24] How do people know their boundaries? And the story of what happened the first time Dallas accidentally overstepped one…
[51:29] Dallas on cuckolding, expectations, and his ethos
Dallas: Just do not come in with expectations. I come in with negative expectations, and come out with amaazing surprises. In so many ways.
Lila: How do you keep yourself from having expectations? I think that’s something very difficult for people, particularly sexually.
Dallas: Uch, I mean gosh, I’ve just practiced that so many fucking times that I go into any situation with: This is gonna be the fucking best night of my life! And I’m like, even if something doesn’t happen, it’s still gonna be great! I mean, I’m— maybe I’m just too philosophical, where I believe everything happens for a reason and shit like that, right? And I get it. I’m too fuckin’ cliché. I’m a fuckin’ walking, like haiku and all that shit. (Lila giggles) But whatever! But I really don’t come in with expectations; I can’t even tell you that enough. And I can’t tell you how many times, when situations that didn’t work, it was applauded that I didn’t have expectations. I wasn’t mad, I wasn’t angry, I wasn’t frustrated; I was cool, calm, collected, no worries. I’ve fuckin’ driven two hours away! Driven! Two hours! That’s a four-hour return trip! There and back. Things did not work out… within five minutes, and I had to get back in my car and drive back. Was I mad? Was I upset? No. This is the price of the game. It is the game. And if you wanna— if you want to get into this; this is what’s gonna happen. I knew what I was setting myself up for. There’s no reason to be frustrated or mad. And I think back to all the times that it did fuckin’ work. Glorious! I’m not here collecting fuckin’ trophies; it’s not about that, but I think back to some of the most amazing, mythical, mystical, magical fuckin’ nights that I’ve had, with amazing fuckin’ people in amazing scenarios, that have ended in hot glorious bukkake come fashion, that will forever be implanted in my mind, that if I ever get locked up in some prison in the Maldives, (which I hope there is where I go!) I could live out all these fantasies that I’ve lived out truthfully, in my mind! You know? And I’m okay with that.
Lila: To me, “This is gonna be the best night of my life” sounds like a big fat expectation! But!
Dallas: (chuckling) Yeah, right!
Lila: But! I think what you’re saying is: That’s more like your ethos. And it’s sort of like—
Dallas: Sure. Oh yeah.
Lila: No matter what. Whether, I come, whether I don’t. Whether she’s into it, whether I leave. Whether he’s into it, whether he pulls the parachute. I am going to make greatness for myself, and enjoyment for myself, wherever I go.
Dallas: I’m for the experience.
[54:51] Dallas on his forthcoming book, GASM
[55:34] Has Dallas ever played any of the other roles in the cuckolding scenario?
[56:25] Dallas on cuckqueens
Dallas: My book is going to try to highlight something that is very very less known, which is something called, I would say a cuckqueen. […] It’s not like, oh well, they’re all over the place; they’re definitely not, but it would definitely be a woman that has orchestrated, organized, their fantasy of a cuckold situation, for the benefit of their pleasure. So they’re just taking the place of the husband. So they basically want to find another woman, a bull, to please, the man.
Lila horizontal, pre-Dallas recording. Seminyak, Bali, Indonesia
Lila: (big breath) So I want to be a female bull. A lot of my fantasies— I would say 90… 98.9% of my fantasy life, centers around threesomes. And 75% of those fantasies are myself and a man and a woman.
Dallas: Yeah, but the woman doing what?
Lila: So the woman is usually, watching; I’ve ordered her to not touch herself or I’ve ordered her to… whatever. Like she has to be across the room, or she, she can’t do this, she can’t do that. So I’m dominating her—
Dallas: Right.
Lila: And I’m enjoying him.
Dallas: Whether you’re submissive or not, right?
Lila: Whether or not.
Dallas: Right, yeah. Well there you go.
Lila: But I’m in a position of control and power over her.
Dallas: Right.
Lila: That is what turns me on.
Dallas: That’s great! I’ve seen it in action.
Lila: (thirsty) You have?
[57:58] Dallas’s words of caution for those of us who want to be female bulls
Dallas: And the most, I think important thing for, let’s just say, a female bull, is to understand, you need to check in with that woman. Because women, operate differently, when it comes to the emotional cord, and the mental cord. You can cross the line, when you are emotionally intimate with a man. […] Versus just strictly pleasure.
[59:22] Dallas’s advice for future female bulls
126. you spilled your hot come on my hot girlfriend: horizontal with the king of cuckolding [1 of 2]
Hello my horizontal lovers, my intimacy investigators, my horizontalists! horizontal is the podcast about intimacy of all kinds, recorded while lying down (and usually, while wearing robes). With few exceptions, our conversations are languorous, meandering, and long-form, as though post-coital, or stargazing, or staring out onto the open road in the wee hours of a very long road trip.
